The Lord Hears When I Call

Psalm 4
1 Answer me when I call, O God of my righteousness!
You have given me relief when I was in distress.
Be gracious to me and hear my prayer!

2 O men, how long shall my honor be turned into shame?
How long will you love vain words and seek after lies?

3 But know that the LORD has set apart the godly for himself;
the LORD hears when I call to him.

4 Be angry, and do not sin;
ponder in your own hearts on your beds, and be silent.

5 Offer right sacrifices,
and put your trust in the LORD.

6 There are many who say, "Who will show us some good?
Lift up the light of your face upon us, O LORD!"

7 You have put more joy in my heart
than they have when their grain and wine abound.

8 In peace I will both lie down and sleep;
for you alone, O LORD, make me dwell in safety.

I started reading "Confessions" by Augustine and he wrote something that made me think about this chapter.

Who am I that God should listen when I call and then answer? Why would He answer me and not another? I can not call on Him unless He draws me to call. He doesn't need me, yet He wants me to call on Him, so He can answer. He answers the righteous, and yet I have no inclination to righteousness unless He puts it in me, as I am only inclined to evil.

Why does God need me to call on Him, when He needs nothing? Why would He want to show mercy and kindness to me, when He gives me all that is good in me in the first place? There is no wisdom in me that He did not put there, and yet He wants me to talk to Him. I have nothing to add to the conversation.

The only thing God gets from a relationship with me is a dependent, needy, sinful person, who left to my own devices would run away as fast as I can back to the sin that so easily besets me. Why does He want a relationship with another needy person?

What wondrous love is this, Oh my soul, Oh my soul. He shows me love and compassion when the only thing I deserve is His wrath. He seeks me out, even when there is nothing lost from His sight. He cares for every one of His sheep, even when we wander back into danger, in love He brings us back to Himself. He never looses one of His children.

He has put joy in my heart more than those whose barns are full and banks are overflowing, because I have Him. When I have Him, there is nothing I lack. He is the provider of all good things, even when those things are trials. I have seen Him using trials to draw me to Himself, which is the best place to be. He takes what seems like "bad" and turns it into what is best for me.

Oh Lord, maker of Heaven and earth, Creator and Sustainer of every thing. Provider of food for every bird of the air and fish of the sea, provider of each heart beat we have and of every breath we take. You are great and glorious and yet You seek me out. You answer when I call to You in my distress, yet if I truly trusted You there would be no distress in my life, because I would always be trusting. Give me faith when I call to You. Remind me of Your mighty works You have done over and over again, that I may not lose heart. I am weak and the "sword" is heavy that I need to carry to fight off the wickedness of the world around me. Give me strength and courage to fight hard, but may I also know that You are the one fighting, not me. Great and marvelous are You, Oh King of the Ancients. Who shall not fear You oh Lord, and bring glory to You name? For You have done great deeds in the land, You have scattered nations who rise up against You and You have sustained Your people even when they have turned their backs on You. You still call them to Yourself. Give courage to Your fearful servant. Make Your name great and crush those who stand against You. Let them see that You are The God of all gods, the King of all kings. There is none beside You.
Thank you for hearing my call and drawing me to Yourself. Keep drawing me and don't let my feet slip. Keep me close to you so that I am not afraid. Keep my love for You hot so there is no distractions that will take my eyes off of You. You are my all in all, and I want nothing beside You. Don't let me go away from Your presence. Hide not Your face from me, for in Your presence there is fullness of joy.